


Your Eyes Say a Whole Damn Paragraph

by HuntersMoon47



Series: Wait For Me To Come Home [6]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-18
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-12-16 18:34:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11834592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HuntersMoon47/pseuds/HuntersMoon47
Summary: Tali'Zorah vas Normandy is on trial for treason. Shepard and Garrus are trying to save her and discover that they need words to communicate less and less.





	1. Danica

_Virmire was already a fucking mess - the argument with Wrex; having to send Kaidan with the Salarians; the defenses Saren had set around the facility; the experiments. Now the nuke was fucked and Ash was offering to stay; as if Danica had a choice. Williams was the only other Alliance officer on the planet; protocol demanded an Alliance soldier stay with an Alliance bomb. Shepard wasn’t known for coloring inside the lines but this wasn’t a reg she could break. But something just felt wrong._

_She caught Garrus’ eyes over the top of Ash’s head. They held each other’s gaze for several moments, almost having a silent conversation - he had a bad feeling about it too; she didn’t really have a choice; he knew that and didn’t envy the call she had to make._

_Shepard sighed._

_“Alright Ash, you’ll stay here and set the nuke. We’ll swing back around and pick you up.”_

_“Yes, ma’am,” Ash nodded, all business as usual. Danica’s chest constricted as she met Garrus’ eyes again. She didn’t like her team being spread out like this. It rarely ended well._

_“Ready when you are, Shepard,” Garrus said. He’d said the same thing dozen of times but it was different today. It was more - like he was saying he understood, that he had her back, that he’d do everything he could do to make sure today end up okay._

_It wasn’t much longer when their eyes met again and the agony in his eyes matched that in her heart. Kaidan’s words sunk into her chest. For once, Wrex didn’t chime in. The silence pressed on her until she could barely breathe and until Danica closed her eyes._

_“I’m activating the bomb,” Ash said over the com._

_“Williams, what are you doing?” Danica demanded._

_“I’m making sure this bomb goes off, no matter what,” Ash said. Danica paced back and forth. “It’s done, Commander. Go get Alenko and get the hell out of here.”_

_“Screw that,” Kaidan jumped on the comms. “We can handle ourselves. Go back and get Williams.!”_

_She looked up at Garrus again, his eyes full of sorrow. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back._

_“Alenko, radio Joker and tell him to meet us at the AA towers,” she whispered._

_“Yes, Commander, I…” Kaidan began._

_“It’s the right choice and you know it, Alenko,” Ash interrupted._

_“I’m sorry, Ash,” Danica said. “I...had to make a choice.”_

_“I understand, Commander. I don’t regret a thing.”_

_Her eyes met Garrus’ again. The words he wanted to say were clear -_ I’m so sorry, Shepard.

 

 _Danica wasn’t sure if her heart broke more in that moment or when Kaidan yelled at her in the debriefing. She held it together on the outside but inside she was shattering. Until her eyes, once again, found the sharp gray Turian eyes that had held her together all day. Garrus gave her just the slightest nod of his head -_ I’ve got your back _\- and she pushed through to the end of the briefing._

_She stood in the middle of the briefing room as Kaidan stormed out after the others. It had been a long time since she’d felt a loss like this. Jennings had been sad, but she hadn’t known him the way she had Ash. The door slid closed and she dropped the facade - stopped being the Commander._

_She’d forgotten Garrus was there - in her distress, she hadn’t even noticed he hadn’t left with the others until she picked up a soft rumble in the silence. She looked up, not caring if hot tears were rolling down her face. There was no judgment in his eyes, no disappointment at seeing his CO cry. There was just empathy; just her friend._

_“I’m sorry, Shepard,” he said, his rumbling voice low and smooth. She broke then; fell apart. But he was there, always there, wrapping his arms around her and she let him hold her until she could hold herself up again._

 

______________

 

It was getting to a point when she and Garrus could have almost an entire conversation with just a look - the nod of a head, a shift of the feet, a finger tap on a gun. Even standing before the Admiralty Board with Tali, she and Garrus were communicating.

 _‘What are we going to do if this goes to hell?’_ Danica bit the inside of her cheek.

Garrus shrugged his shoulders. _‘Then she stays with us. It’s Tali. We’ll take care of her._

Danica tipped her head to the side. _‘Yeah, but she’ll be devastated.’_

Danica didn’t like this situation - not one bit. There was too much political posturing for her to trust the Admirals; Tali was in too much distress to see things clearly; there was too much evidence mounting against her father for Danica to believe he was innocent of any wrongdoing. Going into a ship full of active geth was not her preferred way of resolving disputes, yet here they were. It wasn’t far into the Alarei when she caught Garrus’ gaze once more. HIs mandibles were pressed tight, his brow plates drawn together.

 _‘This is a mess.’_ His eyes flicked to Tali working at a console. _‘The chances that her father is alive…’_

Danica sighed. _‘We don’t know yet. He’s smart. Maybe he managed to stay safe.’_

Her optimism was shattered just a few minutes later when she saw a Quarian body lying in the corridor ahead of them. She recognized the suit from Tali’s pictures. And the crest of an Admiral on his chest.

“Father!” Tali shouted as she dove around Danica and fell to her knees next to the body. “No, no, no. You always had a plan. Masked life signs or - or an onboard medical stasis program maybe. You, you wouldn’t...they’re wrong! You wouldn’t just die like this. You wouldn’t leave me to clean up your mess!”

Garrus shook his head at Shepard. _‘This is not good, Shepard.’_

Danica let out a sigh. _‘I know.’_ She glanced down at Tali and then back up to Garrus. _‘Just, let me take care of Tali first.’_

“Hey. Hey,” Danica said out loud, reaching down and pulling Tali to her feet. “Come here.”

Tali came willingly, pressing her mask into Shepard’s shoulder When Danica pulled her in for a hug, despite their suits getting in the way. Her eyes met Garrus’ again. There were no unspoken words this time, just sorrow and sympathy.

“Damn it. Damn it,” Tali muttered, pulling away. She shook her head. “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” Danica squeezed her shoulder.

“Maybe…” she paused. “He would have known I’d come. Maybe he left a message.”

Danica kept her hand on Tali’s shoulder as she listened to the messages from Rael’Zorah. Tali sighed when it finished and leaned briefly into Shepard’s side.

“Thanks, Dad,” she mumbled. Danica squeezed her shoulder.

“He knew you’d come for him. He was trying to help you. It’s not perfect. It’s not what you wanted. But, it’s the best he could do.”

“I don’t know what’s worse; thinking he never really cared, or thinking he did and this was the only way he could show it.” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. One way or another, I cared. And I”m here. And we’re ending this.

“This console is linked to the main hum Father mentioned. Disabling it shut down any geth we missed. It looked like some of the recordings remained in tact. They’ll tell us how this happened; what Father did.”

“You sound like you don’t really want to hear it,” Danica said. Tali’s shoulders dropped.

“No,” she admitted. “We have to know. I just...this is terrible, Shepard. I don’t want to know that he was a part of this.”

Danica looked back at Garrus. He shook his head. _‘You know he’s a part of this, right?’_

She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. _‘I know. Fuck, I know.’_

She looked back at Tali shaking her head as her father spoke of his promise to build her a house on the homeworld; trembled as he directed his cohorts not to alert the other Admirals about bringing the geth online. Danica, however, felt relief wash over her. The recordings exonerated Tali from any wrongdoing and that’s what really mattered.

“It sounds like he was doing this for you,” she said to Tali when the audio was finished.

“I never wanted this. Keela, I never wanted this. Everything here is his fault! I tried to pretend that it didn’t point to him, but this…” Tali shook her head, clenching her fists and took a shuddering breath. Then she looked up at Danica. “When this comes up at the trial, they’ll...we can’t tell them. Not the Admirals. Not anyone.”

Danica actually felt her mouth drop open.

“What? Tali, without this evidence, you’re looking at exile.”

“You think I don’t know that?” She threw her hands up in the air. “You think I want to live knowing I’ll never see the Fleet again? But I can’t go back into that room and say that my father was the worst war criminal in our people’s history. I cannot!”

“Rael’Zorah doesn’t need you to worry about him anymore!” Danica argued. She looked to Garrus, searching for help, but there was only respect in his eyes; for Tali and the choice she was making. Danica looked back at the Quarian. “Tali, you heard him say he didn’t want you to be caught in the politics!”

“You don’t understand, Shepard! They would strike his name from the manifest of every ship he ever served on. He would be worse than an exile. He would be a traitor to our people, held up for children as a monster in a cautionary tale! I can’t let the good he did be destroyed by this, Shepard.”

Danica looked at Garrus again but quickly saw that he supported Tali on this. She sighed. She didn't like this one bit. What a shit day this had turned out to be.

“We’re not going to decide anything here. Let’s see what the Admirals say when we get back.”

Tali nodded.

“You’re my captain in this hearing, Shepard. It’s your decision. But, please, don’t destroy what my father was.” She sighed. “Come on. If we wait too long, they’ll decide we’re already dead and none of this will matter.”


	2. Garrus

Shepard waited until Tali took a seat in the back corner before she approached him.

“You agree with her,” Shepard whispered. It wasn’t a question. She knew him well enough to know where he stood on things. He so rarely disagreed with her but this time...she’d never known her parents. This was something she couldn’t possibly understand.

“If I were in this position, I’d be asking you the same thing,” he answered quietly. Shepard sighed and shook his head.

“How the fuck do I get myself into these fucking messes?” She grumbled. “I can’t just let them exile her, Garrus. These are her people! She loves them; fought for them. I can’t be responsible for her never seeing them again.”

“Yeah. I get it, Shep. But this is what she wants and you got to respect that,” he said. She shot him her I-fucking-hate-it-when-you’re-right look but he ignored it. “But, you can still try to prevent her exile.”

“How?” Shepard demanded with a loud whisper.

“We might not have evidence that proves her guilt,” he offered.

“Because she isn’t guilty,” Shepard interjected.

“There is evidence of her service, though,” Garrus continued, ignoring Shepard’s gripe once again. “You said it yourself - she’s been fighting the geth, fighting for her people for years. Remind them of that.”

Shepard didn’t say anything. She didn’t really need to - he could see it in her eyes. _‘Thank you. You’re right. I can do this’_ And he just nodded in response to her unspoken words.

Garrus hung back when they entered the trial again; the trial that was just about to go on without them.

“Sorry we’re late,” Tali said to the board. Garrus almost laughed at her sarcasm. The young Quarian was certainly growing into a force of nature. Much like her captain.

“Tali’Zorah vas Normandy saved the Alarei,” Shepard said, taking her place next to Tali. “I hope this proves her loyalty to the Quarian people.”

“Her loyalty was never in doubt,” one of the admirals said. Garrus couldn’t remember their names - nor did he particularly care to. “Only her judgment.”

He saw Shepard’s jaw muscles tightened in response but she remained silent.

“Perhaps Tali’Zorah can offer something to encourage more trust in her judgment,” Shala’Raan said. Garrus remembered her name - the one who was supposedly Tali’s ally. Something about her hadn’t sat right with him. One of the other Admirals chimed in.

“Did you find anything on the Alarei that could clarify what happened there?”

Tali and Shepard looked at one another for a long moment. Garrus saw Tali say something to Shepard but he was too far away to hear what it was. Then Shepard’s eyes met his.

 _‘You got this.’_ He thought, willing her to understand him as she so frequently did. Shala’Raan spoke again.

“Does Captain Shepard have any new evidence to submit to this hearing?”

Shepard looked back to the admirals, leaned forward on the railing in front of her, jaw set in determination.

“I don’t need any new evidence,” Shepard said, loud enough for the whole courtyard to hear. A low rumble of whispers and mutters. “Tali helped me defeat Saren and the Geth at the Citadel. That should be all the evidence you need. But if you want more, I can present the Normandy, which Tali also saved from Geth forces, even though it’s too quiet for her to sleep well.”

Shepard glanced at Tali, a smile tugging on the corner of her lips. Tali ducked her head and Garrus could only imagine she was smiling too, underneath her mask.

“We still don’t know what happened on the Alarei!” One of the Admirals exclaimed. The grin on Shepard’s face faded.

“No, Admiral, you don’t. But last time I checked, we were discussing Tali’s judgment, not the events on the Alarei,” Shepard snapped. “You gave her my name. I’m her captain. I trust Tali’Zorah with my life and I’m telling you, she’s innocent.”

The debate continued for a few more moments before Salah’Raan called for the Admirals to vote. Shepard’s eyes flickered to his several time while they waited. _Do you think it worked? what if it wasn't enough?_ He did his best to look confident for her but still, she sighed visibly when Raan announced Tali cleared of all charges.

“Commander Shepard,” Salah’Raan continued. “Please accept these gifts in appreciation for you taking the time to represent one of our people.”

“With all due respect, Admiral, I didn’t represent one of your people. I represented one of mine.”

Garrus chuckled and moved to wait for Shepard and Tali by the exit. If he knew Shepard at all, she’d want to get back to the Normandy right away, tired of playing politics all day.

“I can’t believe you pulled that off,” Tali said when the two of them finally joined Garrus. “What you said...I’ve never had anyone speak like that on my behalf. Thank you for being there for my father and me, even when...thank you.”

Shepard gently grasped Tali by the shoulders.

“Tali, about what your father said, what he did...you deserved better.”

“I got better, Shepard,” Tali whispered. “I got you.”

Shepard swallowed hard. Garrus could tell she was fighting off emotions. So she laughed and winked at Tali.

“Ha! Yeah, well, you’re stuck with me now,” she said, starting toward the shuttle and slung her arm around Tali’s shoulders. Garrus fell into step behind them. “We can still go back in and get you exiled if you want. I’m just as good at causing trouble as I am at sorting it out.”

Tali laughed.

“Thanks, but I’m fine with things like this. It’s fun watching you shout. The Admirals are not used to meeting such...resistance.”

“That’s a word for it,” Garrus rumbled. Shepard glanced back at him, eyes dancing with amusement and relief. There was something else there too, an ease he hadn’t seen her for awhile. He was sure it had to do with having Tali’s back; having another member of her original team back on the Normandy; back home.

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, turning her attention back to Tali. “Come one, Tali’Zorah vas Normandy, let’s get back to our ship.”

Tali got pulled away by some old friends when they reached the docking bay, so Shepard and Garrus waited for her by the airlock. Shepard leaned against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest, eyes fixed on Tali.

“Thanks for your help today,” she said quietly. “I never would have forgiven myself if she’d been exiled.”

“I’m glad it didn’t come to that,” Garrus said. “But if it had, she would have been okay. She’s got you.”

Shepard’s blue eyes slid up to meet his. He wasn’t sure when it had happened - at what point they’d begun having silent conversations with one another - but he treasured this connection they had. Even now, inches from one another, her eyes said more than her words.

“It will be good to have her back,” she said out loud. _‘She’s home. She’s back where she belongs, thanks to you. You helped me keep her safe,’_ she said with her eyes.

Garrus just smiled and leaned next to her on the wall. A soft rumbled hummed in his chest when Shepard pressed herself into her side.

  


It was several hours later when Shepard came to find him in the Battery. She’d gotten Tali settled in - a permanent sleeping place, security clearances, a spot on the duty roster. Then she’d done her rounds. It was late now, well into the night cycle. He’d finished calibrations more than an hour ago and the extra time had him mulling over his relationship with Shepard. He'd never had anything quiet like it and he wasn't sure how to proceed. Part of him still thought it was all too good to be true; part of him still wondered sometimes if he'd died on Omega and this was all just some fantasy afterlife. There was an awful lot of fighting and killing and galaxy-ending threats for an afterlife, but...

“You got a minute,” Shepard asked. She was dressed in her casual civis - red shorts and her N7 hoodie. Her hair was wet and hung over her shoulder. Garrus could smell the scent of vanilla and brown sugar rolling off her. It must be her soap or...what did humans call it? Shampoo?

“Yeah,” he said, leaving against his workbench. “Actually, uh, I’ve been thinking over what we talked about. Easing tension. Blowing off steam. I’ve never considered cross-species intercourse. And….”

He paused when he saw Shepard’s mouth twitch into a smile. And then he realized what he’d been saying. Spirits, take him. Not for the first time, he was thankful Turians didn’t blush.

“Damn, saying it that way does not help. Now I feel dirty and clinical,” he mumbled. Shepard laughed, shaking her head. “Listen, are we crazy to even be thinking about this? I’m not...Look, Shepard. I know you can find something a little closer to home.”

Shepard’s smile faded and her expression softened. She slipped towards him and reached for his hand, slotting her fingers between his. They hadn’t touched like this since Sidonis. His heart started racing when he thought about that day, about their admissions to one another.

“I don’t want something closer to home,” she said quietly, squeezing his hand. “I want you. I want someone I can trust.”

“I can do that,” he said hurriedly, trying to cover how his heart leaped into his throat; how his subvocals hummed with excitement. “I’ll find some music...and do some research to figure out how this should work. It’ll either be a night to remember or a horrible interspecies awkwardness thing. In which case, fighting the Collectors will be a welcome distraction. So you know, a win either way.”

Shepard grinned up at him and Garrus cursed himself for getting so tongue tied when she was around.

“You know, Garrus, if you’re not comfortable with this, it’s okay. I”m not trying to pressure you. You’re my best friend, you’ll stay my best friend, no matter what. I promise.”

“Shepard, you’re about the only friend I’ve got in this screwed up galaxy,” he said, trying to reassure her. “I’m not going to pretend that I’ve got a fetish for humans but this isn’t about that. It’s about us. You don’t ever have to worry about making me uncomfortable. Nervous, yet...but never uncomfortable.

Her smile grew. He loved that he was responsible for putting it there. She so rarely smiled these days. She squeezed his hand.

“So, when should I book the room?” She asked a twinkle in her eyes. Spirits take him, he wanted to say now, right now. But this was more than just easing tension for him - and he suspected it was for her too. He needed to research; prepare.

“I’d wait, if you’re okay with it,” he finally said. “Disrupt the crew as little as possible...and take that last chance to find some calm before the storm. You know me. I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink...wait. That metaphor just went somewhere horrible.”

Shepard dropped her head back and let out a peal of laughter. Despite his embarrassing metaphor, he smiled. He loved seeing her laugh. She shook her head at him and still laughing, turned to leave. She paused at the door, though, and looked back at him, her face serious once again.

“Just so you know, you’re as close to home as I can be, Garrus,” she said softly. “You are home.”


End file.
